An Intense Moment at Bethlehem (and with Addie)

I find it so interesting that not only was Herod troubled, but also “all of Jerusalem.” They knew the prophecies, isn’t this what they’ve been waiting to happen for so long? Why did they not even go to the house to at least see what the Magi were talking about? Was it too much trouble to go down the road a bit? Am I like this – do I get caught up in the religion of it all, and miss meeting my Savior face to face? Something to think about….

Also want to point out that by this time, Mary, Joseph and Jesus were in a house in Bethlehem, not the stable anymore… makes me wonder whose house – did they know someone there, was it the innkeeper’s, did they decide to just live in Bethlehem and go and ahead and buy a house? Makes me wonder how long of a time frame did it take the Magi to get there – I mean we know that it was about 2 years from when they talked to Herod and when they left, but how long did it take them to find the baby? How long did they visit with them? Just more stuff to ponder, I guess…

As I was reading this lesson, I thought it was good and interesting and all that…. I had pretty much got away from this lesson unscathed – no real conviction at all, I was pretty proud of myself…. Until I got to the prayer…. And very rarely has something described me so accurately…

“I confess I go through times when my heart is as indifferent as the chief priests’ and scribes’. Forgive me when my relationship with You deteriorates into an academic exercise. When my search for You ends with a Bible verse. When I am more intent on finding a cross-reference than finding You. When word study excites me more than worship… I confess, too, I go through times when my heart is like Herod’s, when I get tightfisted about holding onto my little kingdom. Forgive me when I get troubled and challenge Your right to rule over my life. How much heartache could I have avoided if only I had stepped down from the throne and acknowledged You as the rightful King?”

Whoa – I haven’t had conviction like that for such a long time…. And its so true – Ive lost my “first love” and I go through the motions… I love to look up Scripture just to prove a point…. I confess that most of the time I am without mercy or compassion – these are the two hardest lessons for my heart to wrap around…

Lately, my husband and I have been talking about Lent because it starts on March 1st. Weve been going back and forth trying to figure out what could we give up…. What would be an appropriate sacrifice to offer God. What would offer good practice in self-denial…. I have been debating over two different options memorizing a verse a day OR not spend any money on me right now (besides the necessary items) – I have a bad habit for being prideful about my Bible knowledge and also for putting me first above anyone else – buying anything my heart desires…… Both of those points were hit very hard in that prayer, and Im taking that as confirmation that Im not going to do one or the other of the aforementioned sacrifices…. Im going to do both….

Both are areas in my life that need to be cleaned up, and instead of just memorizing a verse for the day, Im going to actually look at the context of the verse and get to the heart of things and really search to fall in love with the God I serve again…. I also need to step down graciously (as opposed to being knocked off) my pedestal – the world was not meant to revolve around me, and when I have a mirror up to my face deciding that I need such material possessions, I miss out on the hurt and need around me….

So here is my public confession that I will do these things to the best of my ability, and I hope that I can count on you guys to hold me accountable as well…. Thank God for this group, what He is doing with it, and you being a part of it…